Mark Leong » Life & times

Bad hair day

Mark Leong — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 13:00:41 +0000

Last night I shaved my hair with my trusty pair of Remington clippers. As anyone who has shaved their heads themselves knows, tidying up the hair on the back of your neck is not something that you can do yourself very easily. So this morning I asked my housemate to help me trim the hairline on my neck, as he has done before.

I have a feeling he might have gotten a little carried away…

Thankfully the local barber managed to do quite a good job salvaging the situation. All’s well that ends well!

Tanzania 2008 trip video

Mark Leong — Sun, 03 May 2009 18:44:21 +0000

Here’s a video from the SoapBox short term project team that I went out with to the village of Kilolo in Ruaha, Tanzania in July 2008. We went to help in the construction of an extension to a secondary school and to run afternoon activities for the local children. We also visited a local primary school, Iringa School for the Deaf, a church in Idegenda, Iringa town, Amani Orphanage and Ruaha National Park.

Bovine Economics

Mark Leong — Sat, 21 Mar 2009 09:24:39 +0000

This list has been around for quite a while, but I had so much fun reading it that I thought I’d post it just in case anyone hasn’t seen it before.

SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.

SURREALISM
You have two giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull.

A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called ‘Cowkimon’ and market it worldwide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are.
You decide to have lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 2 cows.
You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.
You charge the owners for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN IRAQI CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb the **** out of you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy.

AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Business seems pretty good.
You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive.

Schoolboy ‘hair-ror’

Mark Leong — Fri, 16 Jan 2009 22:18:07 +0000

*readers groan* (sorry for the pun; couldn’t help myself!)

As I found out this evening, using my hair clipper with the 3mm guide comb does not have quite the same effect as the 9mm guide comb that I usually use.

Looking in the mirror about midway through the haircut, I suddenly realised why there seemed to be so much hair coming off even though I had only cut it three weeks ago! Whoops!

Inaugural post

Mark Leong — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 00:07:05 +0000

Hello and welcome to the first post of a new blog.

I intend to blog about computing, productivity, health & fitness and life as a follower of Jesus. We’ll see how that goes as the blog matures.

Things to do from here:

Find out more about me about me
Subscribe to this blog (…huh?)
Look me up on Facebook
Find out what I’ve been reading on Goodreads
Browse my photos on Picasa Web Albums

Toodles for now. Happy Christmas and a blessed New Year!